I know for most of us this subject can be a hard one to approach. Christian women have very strong views one way or another on dress and our ideas of modesty. I would like for you to take a look at this blog I follow. Her name is Joy, she and her husband are with MAF ( Missionary Aviation Fellowship) in Indonesia. She has covered the very interesting and challenging topic of femininity and modesty. I have been blessed by reading and sharing with the many christian women who gather there. Read on for a few things shared on her blog.
"True femininity comes from within... a peace that passes understanding, joy abundantly, a light in our eyes, a smile on our lips, kindness on our tongue... it is embracing who God made us to be... confident yet humble, strong yet full of gentleness. She'll be serving those around her, pouring out her life with joy, she'll be on her knees in the presence of her King, she'll be speaking life to those around her bringing them encouragement, hands ready to help, feet ready to go... all done whether in the heart of her home or on the other side of the world serving the least. You can have someone dressed modest and feminine full of worldly beauty and yet missing the the core of femininity, the core of who she was created to be, and you will find an empty woman, empty of life. It all starts from within, yet I think you will see it expressed in every aspect of her life. You will also find women that are not full of natural beauty but somehow they become the most beautiful woman you have seen all because she knows who she is and why she was created, full of joy and gentleness... full of life... a truly beautiful woman."
"Femininity is not the opposite of masculinity, meaning that femininity isn't defined by pink and lace. Femininity is embracing fully the role God has created women for... which is to be a helper suitable for our men. So, femininity is to be a complementer to masculinity. This is part of why we may know so many "feminine" women who all look very different."
I would like to hear your thoughts on this.
I will end with another quote - Kristen say "I'm a wife, a daughter, a sister, and first and foremost I am a follower of Jesus Christ. I am not perfect, but I am "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:14) and God takes me as I am. "
Blessings, Connie
3 comments:
I LOVE LOVE LOVE it when you write. You are so insightful. I miss our daily talks so much.
I totally agree on this. I at first was a bit hesitant to read, because I thought that it was going to be a "wear a long skirt and button up to the neck" post, but I agree that true femininity comes from within, and just being quiet and in the background doesn't make you feminine. Nor does your dress. I have seen very modest women be foul mouthed and foul minded; and I have seen not so modest women who would drop everything in a second to fulfill any Christian duty with joy and tenderness.
I do think there are places, events and people around which more or less modesty is appropriate. If you were addressing a group of men in a presentation you would dress differently than if you were going on a date with your husband. God did create men to be visual, and I don't think there is a sin in dressing to delight your husband when appropriate.
I also think there are ages when modesty is more important. When men and women are younger, sexuality is much harder to understand and control. Maturity is important both for their safety and for the safety of others.
Connie, I completely agree with everything you wrote and with Laurie's commemt also. I would add that fulfilling the role as "complementer of masculinity" should be limited to masculinity that is subject to and living for Jesus Christ. I have seen much misunderstanding of this subject; and a true understanding of both the masculine and the feminine roles (from God's viewpoint)is mandatory before one can impliment it. Those who do not understand; are not fully committed to; or reject their God-given roles in life (their relationship with Jesus Christ) cannot fulfill their relationship with each other...your search for and understanding of life's meaning is commendable and I am so proud of you...Dad (aka Poppa)
I've been thinking about this post a lot, I really like it. I also think that being a blessing to your husband can be an act of femininity (sp?); because in many ways it's an act of surrender to look for ways to bless him rather than curse him - not just verbally, but through your actions.
Modesty can take many forms besides dress. For example, Rafe is almost always gone. With rare exceptions, I avoid inviting a single man in to my house even if they are friends. I don't make a big deal of it, but I always manage to stay on the front porch or have another person around or let them come in if there is two people. Even my friend's husbands whom I have known for a long time, I try to not be alone with them.
It has NOTHING to do with me trusting them or myself or their character, etc. It has everything to do with being modest and respecting Rafe and making sure that there can never be any sly talk or misunderstood moments or even the appearance of something shady from people who don't know us well.
Once, a friends husband came over at night to help me with something and I had not invited him over, and he was quite the talker. It was getting toward evening and I was feeling uncomfortable, not because I didn't trust him but because I had been following the above actions for so long. So I just made sure my blinds were wide open and the livingroom lights were blazing as we sat in the livingroom and chatted. You can see into my livingroom from all sides of the street. I felt that was a modest action.
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